Tag Archives: mistakes

Master the Art of Making Mistakes

anxietyToday was an embarrassing day.  I was on the radio being interviewed by phone and I accidentally hung up right in the middle of a sentence.  I was mortified!  Fortunately, I had entered the phone number in my speed dial so I was able to get back on quickly.  The problem was, my heart was racing and I felt like such a fool and I had to continue with the rest of the interview.

How do you maintain your composure when you make a huge mistake in front of lots of people?  That is the situation good leaders must be able to handle.  We all make mistakes from time to time.  How we handle them differentiates the seasoned leader from the less experienced.

Every leader I have ever interviewed has said they have made numerous mistakes to get to where they are.  And I’m not just saying this to make myself feel better.  Research supports this, as does testimony from the most powerful leaders in the world.  Warren Buffet, for example forgave one of his leaders for making a $360 million mistake, saying “we all make mistakes.  If you can’t make mistakes, you can’t make decisions.  I’ve made a lot bigger mistakes myself.”

“It’s dangerous to be safe” said the president of a large Chicago-based construction company in Bill Treasurer’s book, Leaders Open Doors.  Treasurer tells leaders creating purposeful discomfort is a way to develop future leaders.  In other words, they must learn how to handle uncomfortable situations to grow.

Ironically, in the radio interview, I was talking about my book, Flying without a Helicopter, and how important it is for leaders to be resilient.  I was saying how younger people are getting fewer opportunities in their childhood to build resilience.  And there I was—sink or swim.  I had to be resilient in the moment to not only save face, but be a good role model to my listeners.

It wasn’t my best interview ever, but I got through it and live to tell about it.  It wasn’t fun at the time or for several hours afterward, but it turned into a learning opportunity.  And so it will for you when you make a big mistake in front of lots of people.  At least it will give you a good story to tell.

Yes You Can! 4 Steps to Empowerment

Photo by stockimages from freedigitalphotos.net
Photo by stockimages from freedigitalphotos.net

Feeling stuck? Still living at home? Can’t get the job you want? Not getting ahead at work? Lacking control over your life? Millennials, this post is especially for you. It’s time to take things into your own hands.

These four steps to empowerment are straightforward, but not necessarily easy. You’ll need to gather your courage and tenacity to get through them.

  1. Take Responsibility

The first step is to think of moving forward, not backward. It doesn’t matter whose fault it is that you haven’t done something. Blaming won’t get you anywhere. To empower yourself, you need to admit you haven’t done it and take responsibility for doing it. No excuses.

“Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person’s character lies in their own hands.” ― Anne Frank

  1. Take a Step Back

If you haven’t taken action because you don’t know how to, now is the time take a deep breath, be humble, and step backward to learn a skill that you may have missed. It’s far better to pause and learn than to offer yourself and others false expectations for success.

“There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.” ― Ernest Hemingway

  1. Take the Risk

Empowering yourself is taking charge and facing the consequences. That can be scary and there’s a good chance you’ll make mistakes along the way. Let me tell you a secret: we’ve all been there. Even if you grew up in a seemingly “perfect” household with “perfect” grades, parents, teachers, and bosses alike have all made numerous mistakes. It’s how we’ve gotten to where we are today.

“A ship is always safe at the shore – but that is NOT what it is built for.” ― Albert Einstein

  1. Try Again, and Again

Brace yourself to be resilient as you take risks and make mistakes. You’ll need to pick yourself back up from setbacks and keep a positive attitude as you do it over with the information you learned. It may take several, if not many tries to get it right. Remember Alexander Graham Bell’s 10,000 light bulbs that didn’t work.

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” –Winston Churchill

Stop and Think

by Joanie Connell

stop and thinkThe downside of operating at lightning speed is that we don’t have time to reflect on what we’re doing. We respond to challenges with knee-jerk reactions and leap onto the bandwagon without ever stopping to question whether this is the right way to go. We think it is right because everybody else is doing it and we don’t want to get left behind.

In today’s world, we are all under an enormous amount of pressure to do things quickly. We need to keep up with minute-by-minute stock prices, what is “trending now” on social media, whose kid is participating in the most extra-curriculars, which traffic lane is going the fastest, and what emails are already stacked up in our inboxes. It’s exhausting! Yet, we don’t stop. We keep running faster and faster, managing more and more information.overwhelmed

Ironically, the need for speed is slowing us down. Really. It. Is.

How could that possibly be? It is because we aren’t taking time to stop and think. When we run at full speed, we make careless mistakes. When we do too many things at once, we make haphazard decisions. When we feel pressure to keep up, we mindlessly follow the pack. If we don’t take time to stop and think, we may end up losing the race—remember the tortoise and the hare—and trampling others along the way.

CARELESS MISTAKES

Typos, bugs, and safety recalls are often caused by careless mistakes. We are racing to meet deadlines, under pressure to get torace car print or to market quickly, and we work fast without checking it over. Careless mistakes cost us time and money. For example, the most common reason for the IRS to reject an income tax return is because of a careless mistake, like the person forgot to sign the form. A rejection is usually accompanied by a fine. Thus, slowing down to proofread your tax form could speed things up and save you money.

As much as we like to think that we are good at multitasking, the evidence is to the contrary, especially when it comes to complex tasks. Of course, doing a load of laundry while you are washing the dishes is fairly benign (unless you forget about the laundry). Texting while driving is not. At work, we read email during meetings and wonder why our meetings are so ineffective. At home, we do our homework while instant messaging. It’s hard to concentrate on more than one thing at a time. You can shift back and forth, but even then you may lose time reintegrating yourself into each task. Often, completing a task before you move to another can save you time.

CROWD MENTALITY

Much of our world is online and crowd driven. Add time pressures to the mix and we end up with impulsive, irrational decisions that are made carelessly, without contemplation. Stock market crashes, fads, and riots are caused by a crowd mentality. We lose ourselves in the presence of a crowd. It’s called “deindividuation” in social crowdpsychological terms. When we get caught up in the excitement and momentum of a crowd, we lose our judgment and do things we wouldn’t normally do on our own. Riots after sporting events are a good example. Most sports fans would not smash car windows and set fire to things on their own, but when they get caught up in the post-game fury of a stadium full of fans, they can find themselves doing extreme things. The same is true in business.

Online interactions have a similar effect. People deindividuate when they are online. For example we’ve all seen people post comments on blogs or send emails that they would never say in person. We feel less personally accountable online, similar to when we are in a crowd. And what are we doing online? Creating crowds! People these days define their value by their numbers of followers, friends, likes and retweets. The news reports on what is “trending now” on social media to acknowledge what the largest numbers of people are doing and saying. It may be “trending” but it doesn’t mean it is a good idea.

SOCIAL COMPARISON

People feel better about themselves when they are better than someone else. When you get a B on a test, you feel better when you find out someone else got a C. Social comparison is a way to feel better about yourself by thinking or saying negative things about other people. Gossiping is the quintessential example.

The flip side of putting others down to make ourselves feel good is to compete with others to do better. To feel good, we want to outdo our neighbors, coworkers, classmates, FB friends, and Tcompetitionwitter followers. For example, if my friend is taking 4 AP classes, I should take 5. If the competitor is decreasing costs by 5%, we should decrease by 10%. If my coworker works 10 hours a day, I should work 12. If my teammate runs 12 miles a day, I should run 15. This also manifests with opinions and positions. If others in my political party are moderately liberal/conservative, I will be more liberal/conservative to show I am better or more committed to the group. After enough people do that, the party is broadcasting extremist statements. This is called “group polarization.” We all know what calamities that can lead to.

It’s tpauseime to stop and think.

It’s time to slow down and check our work to avoid careless mistakes. It’s time to pause and make well thought-out decisions to make sure we are doing what we want to do. It’s time to question the crowd to see if it is going in a direction we think is valuable for us to follow. The cost of not thinking is far greater.